Therapeutic Parenting and Teenagers

Basic Tips for Therapeutic Parenting with Teenagers

Hopefully, at this point in your parenting journey, you are familiar with the principles of Therapeutic Parenting; however, it may be of benefit to revisit some of the resources highlighted in the early years sections.

1. Be Honest About Their Life Story

Talk openly about their birth family and background (ideally before their teen years).
Discuss similarities and differences with birth parents to help them understand their identity.

2. Highlight What You Share

Point out shared traits or interests between you and your teen to strengthen your bond.

3. Be Real About Your Own Flaws

Show your imperfections. It helps reduce their shame and builds trust through honesty.

4. Offer Choices with Boundaries

Let them make decisions (like clothes or activities) to feel independent.
Still set clear rules to keep them safe and secure.

5. Make Home a Safe, Nurturing Place

Keep showing love, even when they withdraw.
Small gestures—like leaving kind notes or preparing food—help them feel cared for.

6. Keep Things Playful and Light

Use humour and a warm tone to connect—but avoid sarcasm, which can hurt.

7. Connect Before You Correct

Build emotional connection even when you need to discipline—love first, then limits.

8. Support Their Growing Independence

Talk about how you became independent—share your own struggles and lessons to guide them.

Events for Young People

Have Your Say – We Want to Hear From You!

At Adoption West, we’d really like to hear your ideas about what we can do to support you. Your voice matters, and your experiences can help us make things better for young people who are adopted.

We also want to share updates about what’s happening in adoption and hear what you think about different topics that affect you.

If you have an idea, suggestion, or something you’d like us to know, you can email us at:
adoptionsupporthelpdesk@adoptionwest.co.uk

There are no right or wrong ideas – we’d just love to hear from you.

We’ll also be running activities during the summer holidays, and we hope to meet some of you there. You can find out more by visiting our Events Page.

Online Safety

Online Safety Advice for Parents of Adopted Children

Technology will continue to evolve, and children will continue to explore it. The goal isn’t to eliminate risk, it’s to help young people make safe, thoughtful choices online while knowing they can turn to trusted adults for support.

For adoptive families, online safety is closely connected to identity, relationships, and belonging in the digital world. With the right guidance, children can learn to use technology safely, confidently, and positively.

Why Online Safety Is Important for Adoptive Families

Children who have experienced adoption or foster care may interact with digital spaces differently from their peers. Online platforms can raise questions about identity, birth family connections, and personal history.

Some common situations include:

Searching online for birth family information
Receiving unexpected messages or friend requests
Sharing personal information without understanding the long-term impact
Encountering content that raises questions about identity or family relationships

Supporting children to navigate these experiences safely is a key part of digital safeguarding in adoptive families.

Practical Online Safety Tips for Adoptive Parents

Keep communication open and supportive

Show interest in what your children are doing online, have open conversations, including your use of social media. Children are more likely to ask for help when they know they won’t get into trouble.

Use parental controls alongside trust

Privacy settings, filters, and screen-time controls can support online safety, particularly for younger children, but conversation remains the most effective tool.

Keep adoption-related personal information private

Help children understand why certain details about their history, identity, or family should not be shared publicly online.

Talk about unexpected contact online

Encourage children to speak to you about messages, friend requests, or interactions with people they don’t know offline.

Use parental controls alongside trust

Privacy settings, filters, and screen-time controls can support online safety, particularly for younger children, but conversation remains the most effective tool, partiuclarly if your child enocunters content that is not intended for them.

Know where to get online safety support

Trusted organisations can help parents and carers respond to online concerns quickly and confidently.

Supporting Positive Digital Experiences for Adopted Children

While parents can rocognise the challenges, and potential risks, of interacting with the online world, it is also important to acknowledge it provides the oppurtunity for education, connection, support, and community.

Healthy digital engagement can:

Reduce isolation for adopted children
Help young people connect with peers
Provide access to adoption-aware communities
Encourage creativity and learning

Adoption UK’s Empowering Use of Social Media guide provides practical advice for maintaining safe boundaries while benefiting from online connections.